“Congratulations”

Those were the words from a friend of mine at the end of a yoga class I taught where I shared that my husband and I had been married for 21 years on that special day.  He followed that up with…..you know, birthdays, they come and go…but  anniversaries, well you gotta work to get ‘em.

I had never really thought about that before, but you know, he made perfect sense.  You never had to work for a birthday, they just showed up.  Birthdays are a given if you’re still breathing on this planet.  You get one every year and in the beginning of your life you just can’t wait for then next one…egging it on to come sooner with a proud, “I’m nine and a half” at the slight courtesy question from your moms friend.  Then, as the years go by, you start to wonder why they come so darn fast when all you really want is for them to stop…or at the very least slow down a bit.  Your nine and a half, turns into botox and sunscreen (which you swore you’d never wear).  There’s just no stopping them, they continue to make an appearance simply because you’re still here.

Anniversaries however, well it’s no wonder we still have them in an age where we’d rather throw things away than fix them.  And here’s the thing about marriage:  it takes two.  Two people to continue choosing love for each other.  Two people who grow over time, evolve as human beings, have separate personalities, likes, dislikes, opinions, and  food preferences and then do something crazy  like make other human beings with their own personalities likes, dislikes, and food preferences…..emphasis on  FOOD PREFERENCES.  But at the end of it all, they still say to each other:  I. Choose. You.

Dr. Phil, I don’t know the answer to “what makes a successful marriage?”.  How do you define success in a marriage anyway?  Surely it’s not by the number of years.

Babe - I remember clearly the sound of your grandfathers voice with tears in his eyes (and a slight frog in his throat) as he read these words below before he married us.  Listen closely, you’ll hear his voice too.

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This is me…..upside down and in my painting attire ready to tackle a small tree mural in a local yogurt shop.  Why would I go upside down before a job you ask?  Perspective? Circulation? To get the creative juices flowing?  no. no. and no.

I’m upside down simply because I didn’t think I could do it before I even tried.  Wait – let me back up.  One of my friends is creating a book for school and her topic of choice – yep, you guessed it – YOGA.  She had asked me if she could take a few pics of me doing yoga poses.  Of course I said yes…..I teach yoga after all, how hard could it be?  She then handed me a page of yoga poses that she wanted me to do……um…”I can’t do that.”  I was super flattered that she thought I was fully capable of these incredibly bendy poses, but they simply aren’t in my repertoire…so I thought.

Turns out, I was defeating myself by saying “I can’t” before I ever even tried.  Sound familiar?  How about that job you think you’re not worthy enough to have, the relationship you deserve but seems out of reach, or the life that you were born to live?  Why do we automatically assume we can’t simply because we never have before?   Due to my many observations of noticing my  own self defeating habits on the mat, I simply decided to try.  At first, it didn’t work – as in FAIL.  But I kept at it, trying new ways of going into it, with support, without support, and all around hilarious variations that had me giggling to myself if nothing else.  To my surprise…I kind of did it.

Isn’t it amazing the faith others have in you can compel you to rise to the occasion? Isnt’ it amazing that we don’t always have faith in ourselves?

You never know until you try…don’t. give. up.

Impossible…or I’m possible.  Just depends on how you see it.

Be Possible

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She said:

“I felt like I was holding myself together..when all the pieces of me want to fall apart.”   – Powerful

These were the words that came out at the end of a recent  yoga class I taught in which we held our hands flat over our heart as we chanted our final “OM”.   Was it the whisper of our heartbeats held in our hands or the vibration created from the sound resonating throughout our bodies?  No matter what it was, they were the words that inspired me to once again dust off this blog. The words that helped me realize that while I thought my word -for -the -year was renewal (as in body, mind, and soul)  it really has come down to reassurance that this (whatever this is) is what I’m meant to do.  It’s just what I needed to hear from a student that thought she was the benefactor of her words and experience, but it was really me.

This is why I love yoga.  This is why I teach yoga.  Because it meets you where you’re at, not where you’re mind (ego) and body necessarily want to be, but where you’re at right now.  I’m not talking about the physical bendy what kind of silly shape can you put yourself in kind of yoga.  I’m talking about the exploration of the mental discipline combined with the integration of physical form, breath, and awareness which with practice can take you on a journey of self discovery if you let it.  The kind of yoga that experientially teaches you that it’s okay to give to yourself what you’re not getting from anyone else, even if that means holding yourself together or granting yourself permission to fall apart.

She shared.  I am grateful.  Never stop sharing your story, you just never know who might need to hear it.  Thanks for the reminder.

In peace, love, and light.

Angie

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